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Wed, 29 Jan 2025 02:41:59 GMT

you ever say you'll do something and then feel like you can't talk to that person again until you've actually done it? yeah that's the situation right now lol. i have not actually stopped thinking about my lil adult game review idea for even a second since deciding on it, but i've been running myself in circles trying to get off the ground (which is the norm for me, unforutnately).

it's a lot of perfectionism holding me down, to be honest. i've started writing things a half dozen times and thrown it all out because i keep thinking it needs to be BETTER, it needs to be informative, and culturally meaningful critique, and incorporate knowledge from the realms of sex and gender studies and psychology... and i just don't have the educational background to make it all that i want it to be. i have ridiculously high standards for myself--in a way, i want to somehow write something that i would find illuminating to read, which is quite hard since i need to have the ideas first and then write them, and only then could i read them... well, the only way to get past this particular barrier is to become more okay with imperfection, and i'm working on that on my own time.

moreover, though, i'm also a little unsure where and how to begin--what post to make first, what information to provide upfront vs. drip feed. i know what game i'll be doing first, but it dumps you right in the middle of the kinky side of the adult game landscape and i'm not sure what context is important to provide, if any. i am of course assuming literally anyone besides MAYBE one or two friends will even read any of this, but it's always a possibility. and hell i don't know how much those friends know about this particular realm either, and i'd like to be able to bring at least a few folks along with me for the ride.

well, i will keep working on it. i may not be a scholar with a big robust background in culture or media studies, but i still want to take a look at these games under a magnifying glass, take them apart and look at the pieces like a hobbyist disassembling a radio, even if i don't know how to reassemble it again. i hope i can write something even a little bit interesting to read, but even if not, i'm going to enjoy myself, dammit.

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i automatically started capitalizing this post so i guess i'm doing that from now on

Sat, 31 Aug 2024 20:47:34 GMT

Despite my silence I have been constantly turning blog ideas in my head over and over, trying to decide what's worth sitting and making longass posts about. I have lots of inspirations and 'bunnies' of all shapes and sizes, but usually all my writing urgency comes when I'm stuck doing other tasks (like My Job) and dissipates as soon as I'm free, which makes things a bit difficult. But one idea that keeps returning is Adult Game Reviews. I play rather a lot of them, and think I have a fairly refined taste in them by this point, and I have Opinions.

I have to penny-pinch a bit so I'm not going to be buying many full price games to review, but there's a great many free and cheap ones to cover, as well as a few I splurged on (and often regretted...more on that when I review them). I find a great many games through TFGamesSite, as they have one of the more robust databases out there and an active community; as well as through itch.io, Steam, various forums, or less upright websites (I do try to purchase games instead of pirating when possible). As such there may be a disproportionately large number of transformation-centric games.

The TF genre covers not only general transformation kink but tg kink (gender transformation), corruption, feminization/sissification, and some hypno, all of varying degrees of consent. A lot of these kinks are definitely not "politically correct" or representative of any sound real world values, and this is something I am cognizant of as I play and critique them. I'm no seasoned academic but I hope I can provide takes well-balanced between accepting porn as porn and examining what fantasies are invoked and how and how it affects the play experience, as well as how my own point of view may be biased.

I'll probably post other random stuff occasionally if I am ever hit with The Urge at a time I can actually sit down and write, but this is a nice structured topic I can focus on without running out of material for a while. And more importantly, I hope it will be engaging to read as opposed to my sporadic random brain barf! (The only question is, will I actually adhere to this as a long term project or lose interest after two weeks bc of neurospiciness...only time will tell. But I wanna do my best!) And if over time it directs a little extra traffic to the hidden gems out there...I'll be very glad indeed.

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hello world

Tue, 14 May 2024 06:08:48 GMT

it has legit been so long since i used a proper blogging platform that i do not remember how to do this. but the only way to start is to start, yeah? don't know what i'm gonna post here yet but prob first-draft essays and writing snippets? idk we're feelin this out as we go.

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